Miley: “Dad I have something for Tanners bug collection”
my uncle: “that’s great”
Miley: “it’s a bird”
my uncle: “no its not”
They let it go and it flew away just fine, so we’re wondering how she caught it.
she caught another bird.
update: she caught a squirrel today
She is gonna rule the world one day with this power
taylor is creeping on tumblr right now like
three cats are competing in a race. there’s an american cat named “one two three”, a german cat named “ein zwei drei”, and a french cat named “un deux trois”. the cats all swim across a lake. the american cat finishes first, the german cat finishes second, but the french cat is nowhere to be found.
because the un deux trois quatre cinq
IM LAUGHING SO HARD AT THIS JOKE IF YOU DONT UNDERSTAND IT I FEEL SO BAD FOR YOU
my anaconda don’t want none
unless you DEFEAT THE HUNS, SON
'if lesbians use dildos why don't they just have sex with a man?'
'if straight men like fucking women in the ass why don't they just fuck men?'
Finally, a brilliant response to a dumb question.
how the hell do i talk to people
Stand in front of them and press A
The joke’s on both of you
You end up dating each other